Personally, due to the recent announcement of the bard class, it seems that the World of Robinhood online community is getting plenty of updates as to what to look forward to in the upcoming Return of the Legend King expansion.

Personally, this new class excites me as much as the news of the DeadKnight class, which I personally hope is as fun to play as it sounds like. Can you imagine starting a new class only to find you have been buried alive in a crypt and cannot move? Oh what fun!

Personally, we here at Egotistical Friar have also heard rumors that one of the new zones will feature some of what has kept the Legend King busy these last years, the Principality of Antioch. Oh the joys of destroying those you don’t completely understand! Amen brothers!

Personally I am just glad the devs led us to this point. Following the previous Crusade expansion which finally allowed us into Sherwood Forrest to clean out the many ghosts therein with this story is really starting to bring everything together. And while I have not personally been a party to the higher end raids, personally I do enjoy seeing the vidoes of the Prince John kills in his borrowed holy temple.

Personally, I’m tired of how often our game announcements begin with the word ‘personally’. I think it shows a distinct lack of care for the feelings and opinions of other people. I find it insulting and rude. Personally, I think they should fire the person who keeps using that phrase. Personally.

So last year I took a well-deserved vacation on what I thought was a deserted island. I let everyone know that I’d be gone for about a week, then prepared to lay out in the sands and let my mind drift.

You can imagine my surprise when I found that the island was, in fact, inhabited by a race of indigenous troll peoples, the Zandalar Tribe.

After convincing them that draenei meat is tough and stringy, definitely not worth eating (true story, it’s all the space travel), we managed to strike up a rudimentary communication channel using hand motions and exaggerated facial expressions.

I found that they were simply atrocious chefs. Really quite abysmal, shockingly so. There are only so many ways that you can cook a sand lizard, and somehow they managed to find the only way that turned it into old shoe leather.

Well, I could see that my work was cut out for me, so I rolled up my sleeves and set about teaching them the finer points of cuisine. Time passed, and we had finally made it all the way up from Not Burning Meat to the delicate pastries and baking of breakfast food when a gnomish flying machine burst through the overhead greenery.

“Vonya! Hurry, climb on!” shouted a familiar voice. A rope ladder fell neatly at my side and without a second thought I leaped onto the ladder and was pulled away.

As the flying machine zoomed off, rescuing me from my kidnappers, I could hear the mournful cries of the people below as they lifted their bowls of waffle batter into the air and screamed, “Leggo my Ego!”

Badumche.

So the United States government approached me last week and said they’d been monitoring my blog and had, after much deliberation, decided to make me the new symbol of the country.

I said I was flattered and honored, and somewhat surprised that it had taken them this long to get around to it. But sure, why not? I had some extra free time the following week, so I accepted and penciled them into my busy schedule.

They said they would need to take a picture of me to put on the dollar bill and on quarters and whatnot, so I decided to go ahead and splurge. I got my hair done at that new orc joint in Shattrath. She gives me this “experimental” leave-in conditioner treatment, tells me that when I wake up in the morning I’ll feel like a new woman.

I wake up the next morning and my hair’s lying there on the pillow next to me. My dome is smooth and round as a baby’s bottom. I was furious, but there wasn’t much I could do. I still looked that way when they took the picture.

Anyway, next month you should start seeing the familiar bird of prey on most currency replaced by a Bald Ego.

Badumche.

Get it? Because EGO sounds kinda like EAGLE. Work with me here, people.

Some of you may not be aware of it, but there is a part of me which disdains the usage of sarcasm and biting wit. Which dreams of standing before a congregation in the temple, of raising the good book and preaching the Light to the poor sinners and swine that make up the average man.

Hard to believe, I know. Generally I am able to quash my evangelistic side, that deviant part of me that longs for the pulpit….

….

….this, of course, is my Altar Ego.

Badumche

*runs away*